Total Drek

Or, the thoughts of several frustrated intellectuals on Sociology, Gaming, Science, Politics, Science Fiction, Religion, and whatever the hell else strikes their fancy. There is absolutely no reason why you should read this blog. None. Seriously. Go hit your back button. It's up in the upper left-hand corner of your browser... it says "Back." Don't say we didn't warn you.

Tuesday, November 02, 2004

Did he get federal matching funds?

And today, on our long-anticipated election day, a dark horse candidate emerges from the shadows. Is it Ralph Nader? No, I said "dark horse," not "egotistical batshit-insane horse." No, this candidate has an extensive history managing a large paramilitary organization and his tenure is at least as successful as G.W. Bush's has been.

Check out this example of his political ads to learn more about this exciting candidate.

Amazingly, I don't think he'd be any worse than Bush.

All that said, I'm going to spend the rest of the day chugging antacids and going crazy with the election tension. God help my poor, innocent students. They'll be lucky if I don't end up yelling at them for an hour this afternoon.

"Did you vote? No? Why the fuck not?! Wait, that's why not? That's an absurd reason! Only a complete goddamn moron wouldn't vote for THAT reason! Are you a complete goddamn moron? Well, are you?! Wait, shit, I grade your tests so I know the answer already: yes, you are some kind of subhuman primate. Hell, that's not even being very complimentary to subhuman primates! You're one of those fuckers I get stuck behind at the self-check lane at the supermarket, aren't you? Christ, people, you have to scan the barcode, not some random swatch of the packaging! What's the machine supposed to be, psychic? Now, anyone who wants me to kick them in the face for extra credit, raise your hand!"

And to think some of you believe I'm exaggerating.


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