Total Drek

Or, the thoughts of several frustrated intellectuals on Sociology, Gaming, Science, Politics, Science Fiction, Religion, and whatever the hell else strikes their fancy. There is absolutely no reason why you should read this blog. None. Seriously. Go hit your back button. It's up in the upper left-hand corner of your browser... it says "Back." Don't say we didn't warn you.

Wednesday, November 17, 2004

Have you ever heard the term, "Computer Widow?"

No, this doesn't refer to a female computer whose husband suffered an untimely demise. Computers don't have sexes, nor do they have sex, or get married. It's probably better for us that they don't because otherwise life would be even weirder than it is already.

The above term was taught to me many moons ago by the girlfriend of one of my roomies in college. Now, my college roomies were, to say the least, an interesting group. First there was Todd, from Scarsdale, who habitually asked me if a given outfit made him look buff (The answer, invariably, was "no" since (A) he had the build of a scarecrow and (B) I didn't care). Next there was Rob, who sold date-rape drugs out of our room and displayed an 8x10 glossy photograph of a urinating rhinocerous because it, in his words, "reminds me of my girlfriend." For those who are curious, I never managed to get him busted for the drug sales because he was careful to only have as many drugs in the room as he was going to sell almost immediately, and he never sold them directly in front of me. Then there was Bill, who was a nice guy, but had an unfortunate fondness for country music. I picked up my own mild affection for the genre from him. Then, we come to Brandon, who wore all black, papered his room in aluminum foil, and liked to go to graveyards with his lesbian friend Nicola to practice his bullwhipping. I assure you that, for once, I am not exaggerating in the slightest. Nor is "bullwhipping" a euphemism for anything.

Now, in addition to his fondness for whips and lesbians, Brandon was a bit of a computer geek. I can understand that, I'm one too, but Brandon was far more of a geek than I am. I enjoy computers, I find they make my life easier, and I know my way around them, but Brandon considered them to be a part of his very soul. So, when it came time to choose between spending time with a girlfriend and spending time with a hard-drive, Brandon frequently faced a very difficult choice.

So, on one of these evenings when the pile of silicon won out over a somewhat curvier pile of carbon and water, my roomie's girlfriend plopped down on the couch next to me and declared, "Brandon has a new OS so I'm a computer widow for the night." Indeed, this was a regular occurence and the main reason why I usually didn't study in the living room. Not that my roomie's girlfriend wasn't fun and all, she was amazingly normal considering who she was dating (Not to mention that, unlike the girl who replaced her a few months later, she didn't have eyebrows like Leonid Brezhnev.), I just had better things to do with my time than entertain her or listen to her bitch about her goth boyfriend.

What does all this have to do with you? It's simple: Today is Wednesday the 17th of November, 2004. Yesterday, Tuesday the 16th of November 2004 the sequel to one of the best-selling PC games of all time, Half-Life, was released. I happen to have a copy of this game, which is unsurprisingly known as Half-Life 2. This game, which was delayed by more than a year, is so far proving to be everything we've all dreamt of and more. So, between keeping up with my dissertation work, teaching my class, and trying to keep up with basic feeding and hygeine, I just don't have the time to wedge blogging in.

Yes, I'm sorry, but I'm afraid that, at least for now, you're all computer widows. Sorry about the inconvenience.

3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

May we infer from our loneliness that it's a good game? Fully intimidated by the game's system requirements, I have not yet squandered next semester's coffee budget. But I did load up Half Life last night and replay a few old saved games, just for fun.

- Alan

Wednesday, November 17, 2004 10:14:00 AM  
Blogger Drek said...

Good? Oh yes. Very good. I'll wait to give a full review until my awe at the graphics wears off.

And that's even with the resolution turned pretty far down so my system doesn't have a panic attack.

Wednesday, November 17, 2004 11:49:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Yes, I'm sorry, but I'm afraid that, at least for now, you're all computer widows."

Oh, you tease us so.

Friday, November 19, 2004 4:40:00 PM  

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