Total Drek

Or, the thoughts of several frustrated intellectuals on Sociology, Gaming, Science, Politics, Science Fiction, Religion, and whatever the hell else strikes their fancy. There is absolutely no reason why you should read this blog. None. Seriously. Go hit your back button. It's up in the upper left-hand corner of your browser... it says "Back." Don't say we didn't warn you.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

A creative approach...

The Scene: Drek is doing dishes while his Sainted Fiancee sits in the living room looking online at various wedding invitations. She periodically reads off the text of one or another either as a genuine suggestion or an invitation to mirth.

SF: You ready for another one?

Drek: Sure.

SF: We believe that God gives life as a chance to give life to love. We
Sainted Fiancee and Drek the Uninteresting together with our parents request the honour of your presence as we celebrate the love we've found and are united for eternity in Christ.

Drek: Yeah. That really says 'us' doesn't it?

SF: Oh! How about this one!

Drek: Hmmm?

SF: We have experienced love . . . in our parents, our families and friends and now a new love in each other. Together with our parents, we Sainted Fiancee and Drek the Uninteresting invite you to share with us a celebration of love.

Drek: It sounds like an admission of pedophilia and incest with a bacchanalia to follow.

SF: That's a no?

Drek: That's a no.

SF: Okay.... how about this:

SF: October Thirtieth, Two Thousand Six Sainted Fiancee and Drek the Uninteresting will be exchanging their wedding vows at Six o'clock in the evening. They therefore extend their warmest greetings to all you Lords and Ladies and proffer an invitation to an evening of music and revels commencing at Seven.

Drek: 'Lords and ladies'? What the fuck? I dunno about you, but I'm descended from riff-raff.

SF: laughs

SF: The harmony of love meets with the melody of life to create our beautiful love song. Sainted Fiancee, daughter of George and Patricia Fiancee, and Drek the Uninteresting, son of Bill and Anne the Uninteresting, request the honor of your presence at their wedding.

Drek: Wow. Just... wow.

SF: Yep.

Drek: Hey! I think I've got one.

SF: Yeah?

Drek: Sure! Now, hear me out, okay?

SF: Okay...

Drek: Please join us as the Red Lion of Drek the Uninteresting...

SF: 'Red lion'?

Drek: The Green Lion of Sainted Fiancee...

Drek: The Blue Lion of the Uninteresting family...

SF: Oh god.

Drek: and the Yellow Lion of the Fiancee family combine to form the Voltron of marriage.

SF: laughing

Drek: And YOU can form the head!

SF: laughing

SF: No. Definitely not.

Drek: Oh, c'mon!

SF: No. But maybe if we change it to Captain Planet?

Drek: Sure. He could officiate. I always wanted to be married by a blue-skinned freak in tights.


For those who are older or younger than I am, here's a little bit more about Voltron.

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5 Comments:

Blogger alan said...

Oh, man. Nothing could keep me away from a Voltron-themed wedding. I would wear my very best Battle of the Planets formal outfit.

Thursday, July 19, 2007 10:06:00 AM  
Blogger TDEC said...

All I can say is
*silence*
*dissolves into helpless giggling*
good luck to you both! You'll need it. Wait till you have to discuss the wording with your parents.
*more laughing*
Sorry, I am not trying to be rude, really, it's just that...aw, it's funny. Though you may cease to think that it is soon.

Thursday, July 19, 2007 12:34:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ummmmmm, you missed the black lion. Without him Voltron cannot be formed. You really just have 4 big cats that cannot do a whole hell of a lot. I'm disgusted by your ignorant treatment of the Voltron mythology.

Maybe your bridal party is the black lion? That would make everything OK.

Thursday, July 19, 2007 5:16:00 PM  
Blogger S.S.Stone said...

I feel like I'm responding to a comic strip right now!

Wishing you the best in your upcoming marriage. I'm sure it will be a beautiful day to remember.
Sarah

Friday, July 20, 2007 6:02:00 AM  
Blogger Drek said...

Anonymous: I didn't forget 'im. I'm just trying to keep the black lion down...

Friday, July 20, 2007 10:55:00 AM  

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