Ironically, the earth did not move.
Hojjat ol-eslam Kazem Sediqi, the acting Friday prayer leader in Tehran, said women should stick to strict codes of modesty to protect themselves.
"Many women who do not dress modestly lead young men astray and spread adultery in society which increases earthquakes," he explained.
Tens of thousands of people have died in Iran earthquakes in the last decade.
Mr Sediqi was delivering a televised sermon at the Tehran University campus mosque last Friday on the need for a "general repentance" by Iranians when he warned of a "prevalence of degeneracy".
"What can we do to avoid being buried under the rubble? There is no other solution but to take refuge in religion and to adapt our lives to Islam's moral codes," he said.
Yes, that's right: earthquakes happen because of women and their boobs. Now, far be it for me to deny the power of a woman's chest, but I find this idea just a tad hard to believe. And I'm not the only one. Nor, as it turns out, am I the one with the best idea about how to tackle this ridiculous notion. Jen McCreight of Blag Hag suggested an interesting experiment she termed boobquake. The idea was simple: on a particular day, women should dress revealingly on purpose and we'd all see whether or not earthquakes spiked. And, as it happens, yesterday was that day. And indeed, boobquake did appear to be quite the event,* showing up on the blogosphere as well as in several webcomics. Alas, I learned of boobquake too late to ask my wife to participate.** Maybe next year.***
So, what were the results? Well, as you might expect... boobs do not control earthquakes. I'm sorry if I'm shattering any preconceptions but, you know, it's just one of those things.
And so science has shown that whenever a man (or woman!) says that a woman's chest is "devastating," it's only a freaking metaphor.
* And there I was thinking that Monday the 26th was just an unusually beautiful spring day.
** In the name of science you understand.
*** Hey, it could be an annual event! Sort of like Darwin Day!