Talk about being in the wrong district.

My mother was a teacher for years- most of my childhood- and a damned good one. As such she received many gifts from children at the end of the year. None of them, however, were like those described in this article. If she had, perhaps she wouldn't have retired last year.

Then again, nothing could be better than that year she received an apple with two dozen colored toothpicks sticking out of it.

Seriously.