Total Drek

Or, the thoughts of several frustrated intellectuals on Sociology, Gaming, Science, Politics, Science Fiction, Religion, and whatever the hell else strikes their fancy. There is absolutely no reason why you should read this blog. None. Seriously. Go hit your back button. It's up in the upper left-hand corner of your browser... it says "Back." Don't say we didn't warn you.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

I'll see your nuttiness, and raise you outright madness.

Recently Brayden over on Pub Sociology shared some news with the blogosphere. Specifically, he informed us of a new children's book titled: Help! Mom! There are liberals under my bed! Though this may seem like some sort of joke, it appears that this book is genuine. Now, we might all like to believe that this is an isolated incident- that the right-wing isn't degenerating into this level of stark raving lunacy but, with my usual penchant for dashing innocent hope, I'm here to tell you that the lunacy is indeed running wild.

Recently I became aware of an 8-issue comic series titled Liberality for All. What is Liberality about, you ask? Well, I'll let the synopsis speak for itself:

America’s future has become an Orwellian nightmare of ultra-liberalism. Beginning with the Gore Presidency, the government has become increasingly dominated by liberal extremists.

In 2004, Muslim terrorists stopped viewing the weakened American government as a threat; instead they set their sights on their true enemies, vocal American conservatives. On one dark day, in 2006, many conservative voices went forever silent at the hands of terrorist assassins. Those which survived joined forces and formed a powerful covert conservative organization called “The Freedom of Information League”, aka F.O.I.L.


The New York City faction of F.O.I.L. is lead by Sean Hannity, G. Gordon Liddy, and Oliver North, each uniquely endowed with special abilities devised by a bio mechanical engineer affectionately nicknamed "Oscar". F.O.I.L. is soon to be joined by a young man named Reagan McGee.

Reagan was born on September 11th, 2001. He is the son of a NYC firefighter whose life was spared by attending his son’s birth. Reagan has grown to manhood in an ultra-liberal educational system: being told, not asked, what to think. With personal determination, which alienates him from his contemporaries, he has chosen the path less traveled…the path to the Right.

[Links Added; Misspellings original]

Given his birth, doubtless Mr. Reagan McGee oozes patriotism from every pore. As for the biomechanical enhancement of Hannity, Liddy, and North... I'm not even sure what to say about that. Unless, of course, "uniquely endowed with special abilities," means "given a pre-frontal lobotomy," in which case I'm fairly certain that "Oscar" is too late.

For extra laughs (not to mention shudders of horror) check out the preview available on the site. My favorite page is the one featuring the "Liberty Belles" street gang. Right. Yeah. That's plausible.

Have fun, kids.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

So I have one question. Well I actually have numerous questions, but the one I'm actually going to post is, "so in 2021 how old will Liddy be?" The man was involved in Watergate, the real one, for Christ's sake.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005 11:11:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think you're right about the bedtime book not being a joke. If you follow the link to Amazon, look at the list of books that "other people who bought this book also bought..." A bit scary. Are there books out there called "How to talk to a conservative, if you have to?" -D's SGf

Wednesday, August 24, 2005 12:15:00 PM  
Blogger Tom Bozzo said...

Drek -- holy shit! I hope you appreciated how I called Norquist "scum" in the course of making a point about fairness over at PS.

Anon 11:11 -- I think the concept is like the X-Presidents. Some combination of super powers and/or cybernetic enhancement will ensure that no infirmity will keep Liddy from protecting us from those jackbooted U.N. thugs!

SGf -- the artlessness of the bedtime book led me to track down its publisher, a self-described "libertarian" house, and that also leads to the not-a-joke conclusion. That and the Norquist blurb on the back cover. [shudder]

Wednesday, August 24, 2005 12:29:00 PM  
Blogger Brayden said...

Ah, but the great thing about wingnuttery is that by not being an intentional joke, they become a joke for the rest of us. I love it. We want more, more!

Wednesday, August 24, 2005 12:40:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Along similar lines, how about Pat “lets kill all the non-conservatives that don’t think like me” Robertson over at the 700 Club? Let’s start killing off democratically elected leaders. Yeah, that’s a great idea. That should promote democracy and love for the US and its policies throughout the world.

As a note for those that would like to argue that Chaves was not democratically elected, take a look at the CIA World Fact Book entry for his country ( In summary they state, “election results: Hugo CHAVEZ Frias reelected president; percent of vote - 60% note: a special presidential recall vote on 15 August 2004 resulted in a victory for CHAVEZ; percent of vote - 58% in favor of CHAVEZ fulfilling the remaining two years of his term, 42% in favor of terminating his presidency immediately.”

Robertson scares the living crap out of me, and I used to be a pretty dedicated church youth group and Bible study leading type guy. He is firmly in the wing-nut crowd Brayden is talking about. But unlike Brayden who can just think these guys are funny nut bags, I know people who live their lives based on what guys like this say. When Robertson called for dedicated Christians everywhere to pray for liberal Supreme Court Justices to get sick and die, I know and worked with people who did just that. In fact they organized prayer groups and prayer vigils to achieve that end. Brayden, these guys are not all that funny, and their access to mass media and ability to convince otherwise bright individuals of the rightness of their position is horrifying.

No one in the media has been brave enough to compare these groups and individuals to the radical clerics in the Middle East and around the globe, but they are just as bad and are inciting the same type of religiously justified violence. How can we expect foreign governments to “crack down” on this type of speech in their countries when we are not willing to aggressively criticize it in our own.

Of course I work up on the pissy side of the bed this morning, so take from the preceding rant what you will.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005 2:04:00 PM  

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