Total Drek

Or, the thoughts of several frustrated intellectuals on Sociology, Gaming, Science, Politics, Science Fiction, Religion, and whatever the hell else strikes their fancy. There is absolutely no reason why you should read this blog. None. Seriously. Go hit your back button. It's up in the upper left-hand corner of your browser... it says "Back." Don't say we didn't warn you.

Monday, August 08, 2005

A riddle for you...

For your entertainment, I have a little puzzle for all of you. From the following list, pick the option that is NOT true:

(A) Within a few hours of meeting my sainted girlfriend's grandparents, I found myself locked in their bathroom with orders to kill the rat that had appeared there. The bathroom was roughly the size of three phone booths pressed together, and my armament consisted of a plastic bag and a metal towel rod. During one particularly poignant moment I found myself looking into my foe's eyes, mano-a-rodent, and realized the bitter truth of the situation: neither one of us wanted to be there but, try as I might, I really couldn't come up with a way to get the rat out of the house that didn't involve beating it to death.

(B) Mathieu Deflem, despite protestations to the contrary, appears to have done a little public sociology. Who woulda guessed?

(C) During one of my many, and exhausting, trips this summer I met Ed Begley, Jr. Rather than meet him while he was attending some star-studded event, however, I encountered him in a supermarket. He was there selling his new cleaner, Begley's Best, which is apparently all-natural, (Like that means much of anything. What are other cleaners? Supernatural?) bio-degradadeable, non-caustic, and vegan. Yeah, you read that right: vegan. Mr. Begley assured me that his cleaner works extremely well, citing an occasion when he used it as a detergent and it got blood stains out of his pillows. To this I can only respond: how did blood stains get on your pillows Ed Begley, Jr.?

On second thought... don't answer that.

(D) President George W. Bush, demonstrating once more that there's nothing he won't do to pander to religious fundamentalists, asserted recently that Intelligent Design "theory" should be taught in schools alongside evolution. You know... as science. If we're going to do that, though, we should probably start calling it Extraterrestrial Design just to be clear. I mean, it's a scientific theory, right? Okay, no, it's totally not, but they claim it is, right? So, when they say "intelligent" what else could they be referring to?

Any guesses as to what's real and what's false? Well, feel free to post your hypotheses. The answers are printed in that really little font at the end of the post.

Now go away- I have an ASA presentation to work on.

Okay, truth be known, everything above is true. Every word of it. That scares the hell out of me. Really.


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