Total Drek

Or, the thoughts of several frustrated intellectuals on Sociology, Gaming, Science, Politics, Science Fiction, Religion, and whatever the hell else strikes their fancy. There is absolutely no reason why you should read this blog. None. Seriously. Go hit your back button. It's up in the upper left-hand corner of your browser... it says "Back." Don't say we didn't warn you.

Wednesday, December 06, 2006


I'm really quite busy at the moment and don't have time to write a "real" blog post. However, for your procrastinating pleasure, allow me to direct you to this feature on the fabulous Something Awful. Today they're trying to take advantage of the search facilitators over on ChaCha by asking them to find really random or impossible things. A series of transcripts are posted. Among the funniest are these two:

Sounds about right to me...

Myrrh maid posted:

Status: Looking for a guide ...

Status: Connected to guide: JasonK

JasonK: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.

You: hi

JasonK: Hello

JasonK: You are looking for this image?

You: im after a pic i saw about 3 months ago in a google image search

You: an elderly farmer in a field with cows

JasonK: Do you remember what your search terms were

You: "stoat box" [This is the name of the guy who started this game. -Drek]

You: i think there was at least 2 cows

JasonK: I'm not entirely sure what stoat box has to do with the search

JasonK: Could you explain?

You: ok

You: it was the year 1967, a difficult time for farmers in the midwest

You: stoat boxing was common on farms

You: there werent any stoats in boxes in the picture though

JasonK: Ok

You: has anyone ever asked you do find them lesbian porn?

JasonK: I've never been quick enough to accept the search

You: right on.

It seemed like a good idea at the time...

Caffeine Wolf posted:

Status: Connected to guide: ChristineG

ChristineG: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.

ChristineG: Hello there.

You: Hello I am looking for a store in Texas that sells a number of different items

ChristineG: How can I help you today?

ChristineG: ok....

ChristineG: Let's start with one.

ChristineG: bin bags?

You: I am landscaping you see. I need a store that sells Shovels, Some sturdy bin bags to carry several hundred pounds...of dirt, some quicklime to disolve the damaged soil , some cutting apparatus for small bushes, I guess a meatcleaver would work best. Thank you

ChristineG: Ah....ok.

ChristineG: Is this mail order or do you need to pick it up?

You: Also I may need some rope for. trying up some of the bags

You: I would prefer to pick it up I would not like to give out my current living addess.

ChristineG: Where are you located?

You: I cannot say exactly but around Austin. I would prefer not to cross state lines to find this store if possible thank you christine

ChristineG: Sure...let me check that out for you.

You: If you cannot find 1 store that does all of that then dividing it between 2 stores that are very close to each other is fine.

ChristineG: ok....

ChristineG: Are you interested in a store like Home Depot?

You: yes something like that however the only place i have found only sold the shovel and rape

Christine: Pardon?

You: sorry i meant rope

ChristineG: First let me give you this page then I will search for the specific items

You: ok

You: ah that link I have found another of stores near me. I think this may do

ChristineG: Great...

ChristineG: I was checking to see what they had.

ChristineG: You might have to call them. But they usually have everything that you need.

You: I searched for austin texas in their box. They have everything i think

You: thank you so much for your help I wont forget your good deed ChristineG

ChristineG: Great!

ChristineG: Well ty for ChaChaing!

ChristineG: Thanks for using ChaCha! I hope you had a great search experience!

So, head on over to Something Awful and have a look-see. It's pretty funny and a good way to spend a few minutes.


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