Total Drek

Or, the thoughts of several frustrated intellectuals on Sociology, Gaming, Science, Politics, Science Fiction, Religion, and whatever the hell else strikes their fancy. There is absolutely no reason why you should read this blog. None. Seriously. Go hit your back button. It's up in the upper left-hand corner of your browser... it says "Back." Don't say we didn't warn you.

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

666: The Number of the Condor

Given certain members of my family I have a fairly good window into the environmental community. This is sorta funny since most of my family is comprised of staunch Republicans, but there you go. Some of the Uninteresting clan are pretty damned interested in nature and wildlife. Now, this is good for me because I have someone I can go to for advice on hiking trails and camping locations. It also means that I- from time to time- learn of some rather unusual things. This is one of those times.

There is a bird known as an Andean Condor. As you might guess from the fact that it is a condor, this bird is fucking enormous. Specifcally, it can weigh as much as thirty-three pounds and has a wingspan in excess of ten feet. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, that's right: this bird has wings that are wider than you are tall. Fortunately for us* the Andean Condor has little to no interest in harming humans, but it's still sobering to consider what they might accomplish if they were so inclined.

There is also, as it happens, a band named Iron Maiden. They could charitably be described as "heavy metal," and are basically the kind of band that your mother would have hated. That, of course, makes it just my kind of music but I digress. I hesitate to speculate on their weight but, altogether, they might total as much as 750 pounds. Wingspan is more difficult to guess but, assuming that when they're stoned they believe they can fly, probably isn't over four feet.

So what do any of these things have to do with each other? Well, simply this: one bird enthusiast went to see the Andean Condor in the wild and managed to capture a fair amount of amateur footage of them. That is, in and of itself, pretty damned neat. What he decided to do next, however, was release this footage on YouTube with an Iron Maiden tune dubbed in. People, I could not make this shit up if I tried, and if you don't believe me, take a look for yourselves:

It would appear that 666 is, indeed, the number of the Condor.

Don't get me wrong, I don't object to this or anything. Frankly if more people got this excited about wildlife, we might not be facing the greatest anthropogenic climate disaster in history. Nevertheless, this may well be one of the funniest damned things I've seen in weeks.

And I just had to share.

* Actually, it's more fortunate for the condors than for us. Humans have a habit of eradicating species that regularly predate upon us. Maybe I'm arrogant, but I'm fairly sure we could take the condors if we really needed to.

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Blogger Bad Runner said...

Your wingspan, assuming you are human, is almost exactly how tall you are--try it! Bruce Dickinson (Iron Maiden lead singer) is known for being a shorty--5'6". Even so, his wingspan must be more than 4 feet! :)

Wednesday, August 01, 2007 4:17:00 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

This summer we went looking for CA condors at Pinnacles National Park, on a trail promisingly named "condor gulch." Didn't see any condors, but we did see a bunch of people taking videos of ravens and calling them condors.

Just thought I'd share.

Wednesday, August 01, 2007 5:22:00 PM  
Blogger Drek said...

Kim: That is f-ing priceless. Really and truly.

Wednesday, August 01, 2007 9:12:00 PM  

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