Total Drek

Or, the thoughts of several frustrated intellectuals on Sociology, Gaming, Science, Politics, Science Fiction, Religion, and whatever the hell else strikes their fancy. There is absolutely no reason why you should read this blog. None. Seriously. Go hit your back button. It's up in the upper left-hand corner of your browser... it says "Back." Don't say we didn't warn you.

Friday, May 22, 2009

In which Drek discovers how far his standards have sunk.

Given my penchant for forays into the netherworld of Conservapedia, it will come as no surprise that I picked up right away on this enigmatic-yet-provocative headline:

Or, in plain human language:

Rule #1 For Atheists and Perverts: Convince the children that it's "normal". Watch.

The "Watch" is, of course, a link to this painfully stupid political ad opposing gay marriage:

Right. Yes. Of course, it all makes sense to me now. We have to deny loving couples the right to marry because doing otherwise would confuse children. You know... briefly. Until they got used to it. Because kids aren't known for their ability to learn and adapt. Right.

The stoopid, it makes my head hurt.

The funny thing, though, is that I really had two reactions to conservapedia's headline. My first reaction was that if "Convince the children that it's 'normal'," is rule #1 for atheists and perverts, it isn't one we came up with on our own:

It was during recess at one of Santa Barbara’s adorable, sun-spangled elementary schools that Ashley, a sprightly 6-year-old, approached her first-grade classmate Emma near the swing sets and delivered the bad news.

“You can’t go to heaven.”

Ashley had already determined that Emma, the only Jewish girl in her class, did not believe in Jesus.

Emma protested, but Ashley persisted. “If you don’t believe in Jesus, you are going to hell.”

Their teacher overheard the increasingly heated exchange. When class resumed, she asked everyone to pay attention. People from different religious backgrounds, she explained, have very different perspectives on certain kinds of issues.

Emma, feeling good that she had stood her ground, seemed content with the result. But Ashley was crushed.

“You mean they lied to me right here in school?!” she began to cry. “Because that’s what they taught me here!

How can they lie?”

It turns out that Ashley had reason to be confused. She is a student at one of four Santa Barbara public elementary schools, including Ellwood Elementary School, Hollister Elementary School, Foothill Elementary School, and the Vieja Valley School, that last year opened their doors to an afterschool program known as the “Good News Club.” The club aims to convert young children to their form of Christianity and to encourage them to spread the word to fellow students. The club generally holds its sessions in school facilities, in most cases immediately after regular classes end.

See, "The Good News Club" has done an excellent job of convincing kids that it's "normal" to view everyone who disagrees with you as destined for eternal torment. Great job, guys!

Sadly, however, my other reaction to Conservapedia's headline is simply this: at least they referred to atheists and perverts. You know, in an uncharacteristic fit of tolerance,* implying that the overlap between those groups isn't perfect. It actually inspired me to create a helpful venn diagram in true GraphJam style to help everyone keep things straight:

Hey, you've gotta take your victories where you can, right?

* I'm sure it was just an oversight.

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Blogger Ted Herrlich said...

Have you seen this image?

Friday, May 22, 2009 11:52:00 AM  
Blogger Drek said...

Amazingly, no, I hadn't seen that image before. Heard the expression, yes, but hadn't seen the comic.


Friday, May 22, 2009 11:55:00 AM  

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