That can't possibly be the best you're got to work with, can it?

So, I was over at the usual wretched hive of scum and villainy and happened to notice them crowing about something. And I mean, a lot:



Or, in plain human text- and bear with me, there are a lot of distinct headlines in that box:

The NFL Wildcard game won by Tim Tebow's Denver Broncos drew 42 million television viewers, the highest-rated Wild Card playoff game in 24 years. "According to Bloomberg, the brief overtime drew a 31.6 television rating." (continue reading below ...)

Pro-Christian Tim Tebow -- who would often play with the Bible verse "3:16" painted under his eyes -- completed 10 of 21 pass attempts in his stunning victory yesterday, meaning he passed for 31.6 yards per completion.

Evidence for God? During his college years at the University of Florida, Tim Tebow wore sun shadings with the number 3:16 on them, in reference to John 3:16. What are the odds of Tebow throwing 316 yards in his team's victory over the Steelers? 10,000 to 1? A million to one? Did God Himself make it happen?

ProFootballTalk declared: "If someone was writing this stuff into a Tim Tebow movie, they would have been fired by now because it all sounds too unbelievable." "Jesus observed, 'If you can believe; anything is possible to the believer.'" (Mark 9:23).

Are liberals worried that conservative Tim Tebow's stunning success for the Denver Broncos will make it more difficult for Obama to win the swing state of Colorado? Already CNN is omitting news of Tebow's success on its website's front page.

In one of the biggest upsets in playoff history, 9-point underdog Denver Broncos defeat the Pittsburgh Steelers in overtime. [12] Tim Tebow -- a runner-up for Conservative of the Year 2011 -- was the difference with his 80-yard pass for the winning touchdown. [emphasis original. Yes, seriously.]

Now, I don't actually care about football. I don't honestly care for any organized team sports, with the exception of baseball. I love baseball, but only when I can be in the stands. On TV, watching sports is right up there with watching dancing with the stars.* As such, I don't really know about, or care about, Tim Tebow. If I were going to care about a football player, it would probably have been Pat Tillman, who may have been an atheist** (however much some people want to deny that possibility) but was definitely an unusual and interesting young man who died too soon while trying to do something selfless. All that said, here's the thing: Tim Tebow is proof of god? Really? I mean, really? Is that the best you've got at this point? Screw the argument from design- I mean, it does suck after all- forget about the ontological arguments, which are pointless and stupid, no, we have something better: we have Tim Tebow throwing 316 yards worth of passes in a game! WOW! Why, if only I'd know about this sooner, there's no way I would have become an atheist!***

I just don't know what to say about how the Conservapeons advance their positions sometimes.



Just sayin' is all.


* And, as my wife can tell you, I am NOT a dancing with the stars fan.

** I don't actually know if he was, but honestly I don't think it matters. Atheist, agnostic, Christian, Buddhist, whatever- he was an interesting guy who was poorly used by his country.

*** Not actually true. In point of fact, absurdist arguments like this actually helped convert me to atheism faster.