Did You Notice?- The Purity Bear: Dinner Date

So, this is an advertisement in favor of abstaining from sex until marriage. Take a look and then we'll see how many of the interesting features you managed to pick out. C'mon! It'll be fun!



Okay, so, did you notice (with times in parentheses):

-The good Christian girl is dating a boy who drives a nice, American car? Wouldn't want one of those foreign cars built by heathens! (0:03)

-The director really seems to enjoy scenes of slowly driving and parking? This may signal his awareness of the quality of his acting talent. (0:00-0:17)

-The American car has a fancy built-in GPS system? Clearly, this boy or his parents have some money. Really, there's a very interesting class story in this video. (0:21)

-The boy apparently gets his advice on sweaters from Mr. Rogers? Honestly, that sucker probably guarantees his "purity" all by itself. (0:30)

-The boy reluctantly making the move after he gets an engraved invitation from his date? Based on his facial expression, I think he was much more interested in going home and catching that "Father Knows Best" marathon. (0:41-0:45)

-The girl's sudden psychotic break and segue into hallucinating a stuffed bear that speaks? (0:46-0:47)

-The fact that the blonde white girl on a date with a financially stable white boy who gets his fashion sense from the 1950s is hallucinating a sassy black woman as the voice for said bear? (0:48)

-The bear is, itself, black in color? (0:48)

-The bear is wearing a silicone wrist band which is, I assume, purity related? (0:48)

-The comparison of a woman who has sex to a pizza that's been eaten? (~0:50)

-That the bear is honestly the best actor in the entire bit? (0:49)

-The girl physically prying the boy's hand off of her neck? (0:55)

-The classic "If we really love each other, we'll wait" line? (~1:00-1:02)

-The boy's faked reluctance to agree? Damn, bitch, get out of the car! Father Knows Best ain't gonna watch itself! (1:04-1:07)

-The girl's date outfit? Christ, did you get that from Bonnie Tyler's yard sale? (1:15-1:17)

-The boy lingering in the driveway, wondering why his date suddenly started pretending to be a sassy black woman? (1:17-1:20)

-The vague, confusingly-phrased, unsourced statistics? The 2/3 of girls statistics applies to adolescents, which I do not think our actors qualify as. That stat, at least, I can source. The chronic depression and sex out of marriage thing may be reverse-causation (i.e. those prone to chronic depression are having sex in an effort to drive back the sadness). I don't even know what to do with the last one- more success at what? Being virgins? (1:23-1:33)

-That the person who designed the "Day of Purity" placard at the end clearly got his inspiration from an ironic place? (1:36-1:41)